Monday, February 25, 2008

CHEERS!

I am 20! Reflecting back at the 20 years of pranks, cranky and bandy talk, idiosyncrasies (wheee) those bright faces radiating happiness and then (aaargh) those fights, heavy silences, the tears which never seemed to end, a number of faces race through my head but a few linger on.

There were people who stayed by me, returned all the smiles, consoled me through the tears, there was this happy sense of belonging, a bonding but then there was this sudden unseen barrier which drifted us apart and almost as suddenly as it sprung up it disappeared. I've often wondered why?

And then the truth dawns. Meet people, have fun, bonding follows, share stuff, have more fun, intensity increases, but somewhere down the line you start judging people...the perception of a person changes...all the warmth, the so-called love, the affection slowly ebbs away only to be replaced by a sudden indifference or maybe bitterness...We slowly drift apart, I move onto find more fun and happiness, leaving behind those once happy relationships untended..but then again I return to normal..feel all good about myself, the warmth and affection slowly comes back.Those forgotten smiles come back. These are those people whose presence moves outta my life as easily as it came in, a few maybe a little harder.

And yet another truth dawns. I realise over time I have known a couple of people who have slowly stopped to judge me..the initial attraction, the happiness we shared, those innocent impulsive acts is all they connect me with, is all that I connect them with. My mood swings, my pied tones are all accepted with a patient smile. They just radiate this everlasting calm and affection leaving me in this ambivalent emotional muddle, a mixed feeling of nostalgia and elation, an inability to express my feelings, a sudden loss of words, just this growing warmth in my heart. The tears flow yet the smile lingers. Here's to those two people who have always seen through me and only saw the good and called the bad puerility, accepted me for the person I am with this amused smile, here's to Buff and Viv, CHEERS!

10 comments:

nalini said...

Who are they again ? ;) Cheers to you too!

Nikki said...

My dear reflection!

Some ppl mean more to u than the rest! I'm talkin abt ppl who accept u n love u for what u are. Some relationships do not require a special effort! I'm talkin of those that come naturally to u...u can completely be urself...no matter what! Ah well, yes, lotsa ppl "walk" in and outta ur life-but then how many of them manage to make an indelible impression....a handful right! Again...these are the ppl u can rely on come what may! So long as u have ur support systems strong, why worry?!?:)

Loved this write-up of urs....it has a thousand emotions...beautifully knitted together! I notice a flawless flow of thought....gal keep that up!

Would love to read more!Keep blogging!

Cheers!

hc said...

too gud to comment on!!!brilliant piece of writing..........

kalitheja s said...

tht blog of ur's was really lovely to read!!! its so lucky to have such pristine thoughts in ur writing ..gal.. "very gud"

hc said...

long tiem no post...is the bloggger in u alive or in hibernation?? lol

Vivek Krishnan said...

and i'm pretty sure i'm the "pristine thought" AND the "brilliant piece" mentioned somewhere above..

JOSEPH said...

hey ur blog, its awsome to read...the way u expressed ur thoughts and ur feelings - really brilliant.....

Kartik Srinivasan said...

hi, i dont know u..came to this blog thru ur orkut profile. Well what can I say and this is no idle praise..sometimes very rarely u get to accidentally read something that instantly relates to something that is troubling you at the back of ur mind and it offers a perspective which makes you think. This article of urs served a similar astonishing purpose for me.

Actually this in a way relates to common sense...that relationships develop over a period of time and only when they face ups and downs do they become stronger. Your best friends are those who stay by your side when u r at ur bitchiest or doggiest best and even help you tide over it. Everybody should have at least one such person in life, oh otherwise it would be so difficult.

You know, I too write a bit and what I realise is when you write something that has affected you deeply or about emotions deeply felt, even other's find that they can connect to it. Guess at a basic level we all go thru similar emotions, however different our personalities might be.

Unknown said...

beautiful piece of writing.... so much emotion blended with reality and as nikhila said flawless flow of thought... simply amazing... !!!

sandy said...

when new friends are made, a new network is formed. People come, people go, voids are created but the network is intact. Gaps need to be filled. You cannot question the network.